Here's a simple Prayer for Memorial Day, from your friends at Assailable Cool.
(If you're not the praying type, the following may easily be construed as a "toast" - Be creative.)

To the Men and Women of the United States Armed Forces,

May the Lord bless you and keep you,
and may He guide our country toward a hatred of greed
and imperviousness,
so that we might bring you home
soon.

Amen.

I realize that is directed more at our current troops, than at the veterans who have served us thusly,
but hopefully you gave them your thanks in other ways today (parades, cemetery services, pouring out a 40...whatever),
so the thoughts at AC are to those serving now, and the hope that the bloodshed ends before we lose one more life (American, Iraqi, or Other).

Bless you all.

A special AC1 that was playing through my head all day today:


The Decemberists "16 Military Wives".

...and a Print Deckie to boot - AC Recommended Reading: Citizen You!
Read it... and you'll want our "boys" back in-country tomorrow, too.

Since I mentioned my iTunes Top 25 a few posts ago, I thought it might be interesting to let y'all see what others make the Top 25 cut.

Let's just say that, when I went out to look for "Feel Good, Inc." on the list, I was very surprised to see Astaire at the top of the heap. WAAAAY at the top. Maybe the dog listens to iTunes when I'm not here. Anyway... Enjoy!!!

Special Bulletin:
M.I.A.'s "Galang" is this week's free song at iTunes Music Store. Go get it now.
This fiery Londoner is breaking across the world, and this song is leading her charge. Funky, world-music infused riddim, this song makes you wanna bounce. It's been a Deckie ever since I caught her video on iTunes. But now it's a free addition to your music collection. Sweet deal, kids.

Other Deckies:
Season Finales (24, American Idol, etc.) Thanks for giving us a great year, and now, thanks for giving us some time off!
Squirrel Nut Zippers (the Band and the Candy...mmmm)

Cover Songs: Electric 6: "Radio Ga Ga" & Cake's "Guitar Man" Good listinin' from these old-school/new-school crossovers.

Entertainment Weekly's Summer Music Preview

In maybe the quickest move from Deckie to "Can't Live Without" song of the day, the new Gorillaz cut is tearing up the AC world right now.

I've been a fan of Damon Albarn for a long time (since a friend took a risk on Blur's Parklife over 10 years ago...), and I like what he tried on the first Gorillaz album. I have to admit, it took me by surprise, and I didn't like it as much as my favorite Blur CDs. But then came Think Tank and I was finally ready to see what else the Gorillaz had to offer.

I'm not up on the whole "animated band" thing, so if any good reader wants to fill in the holes on what "character" Albarn is, we'll toss a Cool Point Bone your way... But all I know is that this song is irresistible (at least after the 5th or 6th listen). My iTunes has already registered it as a Top 25 Most Played song (a list that hasn't seen an entry since January - it currently takes 43 full listens to make the bottom spot...), and I still can't get enough.

That, ladies and gents, is the hallmark of an AC1.

We'll see, though, if it drops back to Deckie as quickly...

Hmmm. So what makes this so good? I think that deep down, the disparate parts just shouldn't work together. The Albarn lilt is used as both the primary vocal and a few sampled effects. De La Soul manages to drop in without tossing "Plugs" everywhere. And in the end, the random guitar and bouncy bass takes this up above other contenders for Summer Radio Groove Number 1.

Let's watch what happens... But for now, this cut's got AC Feeling Good....Incorporatedly so.

Cool Points:
"Feel Good, Inc.": 5 (plus 1 Deckie pt.)
Albarn: 2
Gorillaz: 1
Parklife: 1
Great Escape:5 (because I'm the only one that likes the album! Deal with it!)
De La Soul: (Plug) 1

Interesting Note: Spell Check wants me to replace "Parklife" with "forklift". I actually had to think about that one...

This week's Deckies:

Music:
Kaiser Chiefs: "I Predict A Riot"
Gorillaz: "Feel Good, Inc."
Ben Folds: "Landed "
Hot Hot Heat: "Island of the Honest Man" & "Goodnight Goodnight"
Learn French in Your Car

Reads:
WIRED magazine
Tale of Two Cities

Views:
The Office, Season 1
24

Coworkers:
Sauce


Coming Soon: A Cool Point Roundup! In the sidebar!

Go! Assail now!

Baseball is a good sport.

I'm still not sold on watching it on television. It does have a knack for dragging, sometimes. But when you're actually playing the game...out in the diamond or outfield, there is a magic about the game. It's a beautiful thing to be out there, 9 people drawing into 1, facing down a batter together...It can be great.

Still, it's not to deny that there can be lulls, especially when you're watching a prima donna batter stepping in and out of the box, as if wasting another 5 TV seconds is going to earn him a perfect pitch.

But as the game goes, casual observers point to 1st Basemen, Short Stops, or Catchers as the grunt workers, the Pitcher as the Star, and the other fielders as the strong, silent support staff. But I think that the true crackle of baseball is actually to be found elsewhere. To me, the real action is to be found in the little conspicuous rings down by the dugouts, where you'll find the on-deck men...

I think that the entire game, the entire entity of baseball, can be simmered down into what's going on in the on-deck circle.

When you're at-bat, the focus is on you, and you control the "Now"; if you're at bat, your goal is to hit the dumb ball... But if you're on-deck, you control the future. If you're on-deck, you are already responsible for crafting something out of the thousand possible scenarios that could play out from the teammate ahead of you. The thoughts of all the endless outcomes fall on your shoulders...Everything that has happened so far, and everything that happens after circles back around to the Deckie. You have to be a contributor, even before you can physically give anything to the game.

And you're thinking: What if you're on deck and the third out comes in? Well, then the future is still in your hands... And unlucky you, you have to wait through a whole offensive half of an inning before you can do anything about it.

That's a lot of responsibility. But thanks to the willingness of the roster to funnel through the on-deck circle, the burden is shared, and the team is held up through the game: win or lose. But no matter what happens, and what the final outcome is, it was all of the promise, the thoughts about molding the game from infinite possibilities, that makes the game live for me.

I see Deckie moments as the steel girder holding up the entire game. Without that psychological commitment, the rest of the game is just exercise and basic physics. With Deckie moments, the game becomes more complex and involving. Next time you visit your hometown Class A team during beer koozie night, keep your eye down there, and see what it adds to the experience.

I've extended this theory of Deckies into other areas of my life. Whenever I have a coworker that is slugging through a task, not for personal glory, but because their hard work and dedication to a possible future is simply a beautiful thing; they're a Deckie. If a great newspaper article changes the way I perceive a developing news story, it's a Deckie. If another driver lets me merge coming out of a construction zone, they're my Deckie. If I've had a great lunch, and it keeps me going strong the rest of the day...sure it's a Deckie. Anytime I get some support from an item of interest that seems like it comes from a specific nexus of event and possibility, and it worked in my favor: It's a Deckie.

In the Assailable Cool World, Deckies will be given out freely, to media events (again, most likely songs) that keep me going. They deserve mention, but they aren't 1s, they aren't Flix, they aren't Tubies. Most Deckies will get 1 Cool Point for each mention.

This will also be my way to give props to old events/items that I rediscover and reclaim - but can no longer hold their cutting-edge place in the world, because they're too frickin' old!

Let me know your Deckies, too! What songs still make you smile after hearing them for 5 years? What reruns do you sit through (with commercials - !!!) just because you love them so much, or they remind you of a different time? What movies do you take to every friend's house, just because there's a small, slight, barely breathing chance that they'll bring it up in conversation and want to watch it?

So, that's your Deckie Defined.

Here's a special Cool Point: Going out to the OSL Lady Bugs, for most creative use of an On-Deck Circle.
Way to go, girls!

They just keep getting smarter.

If you were around for their 2003 release, Two Lefts Don't Make a Right, But Three Do you know what I'm talking about. Their tune "In Love with the 80's (Pink Tux to the Prom)" beats the crap out of Bowling for Soup's name-dropping 80's pean from last year. It's smarter, livelier, and leaves one with a better impression of the Brat Pack Decade. The standout from that album, though, is "Mood Ring," where our Canton, OH, homeboys dream wistfully of an external indicator of their girlfriend's feelings. Check it out...

But now, they give us this gem.

This week's AC1 balances moderated punk screaming, banjo picking (!!!), Tesh-worthy piano segues (!!!!), intelligent lyrics and one of the best titles of the decade (so far) to give us something that stands right up to the hype of Green Day's American Idiot.

I'm excited to see what they might do next.

This pick might have something to do with the fact that I drove a K car around for a while as my sole means of transportation (It did lend gravitas to "If I had a $1000000"). But I invite you to check out this tune, and assail!

Here's another level of cool. These stand-up guys are also very devoted to their Christian faith. But unlike contemporary Christan acts that seem to be in the industry because it gaurantees a (red-state) audience, these guys know that the talent God gave them should be used to reach as many people as possible.

So growing up in this post-modern media-soaked world, they seem to know that if they make the best music they can, make an audience-attracting splash in the music world, and then show everyone that all rockers aren't druggie/drunkie/f-word spewin' blowhards, they might be able to turn more minds on to the Message, than if their songs were their only message.

Just something to think about, Stryper, if your comeback takes hold...

They're getting Warped this summer, too... Guys, if you're tuning in: The middle finger can be a sign of respect at the Warped Tour. Don't let it get you down. And pretend that all the people showing rock-on "devil horns" are just Texas fans. It helps.

I've got some catching up to do on the AC1s... So keep tuning in!

So here's the wizzle:

Never mind that the lyrics inspire thought, read like a poem, and sound absolutely luscious being crooned in this song, it's the beautiful tune that continues to mesmerize and enchant here at Assailable Cool. From its svelte fade-in, through its soft-effect guitar bridges, the gently driving rhythm and barely constrained bass line (doesn't it feel like it wants to rip away and join some other song?) this song makes my soul jump and shout, and makes my tear ducts think they need to start working. Hauntingly beautiful, deeply rich. And ever since I heard it in Garden State, my love for it has yet to fade.

There's the Gold Standard for an AC1, kids. There may never be another song so brilliant listed in the AC1 ranks, so I might as well use it to get out of the gate strong, right?

Other reasons I can't get enough of this song?

1) It's the only tune I can sing in my head that effectively eliminates my ability to hear the Muzak they play at work. Huzzah!

2) I have always wanted to be the one to invent new slang. Look at how much credit the Snoop Dizzle gets, and we all know "iznit" and "izzle" have been around for ages. My wife and I have been on a futile quest to introduce "Super Heavy" into the lexicon, as the next generation's alternative to "cool." It's hard, though. Every year, she tries to drop it casually around her 4th grade students, but not a-one has yet picked it up. :-( We don't want it used in the 70's "heavy" sense, because we don't want it to be associated with anything downerish. We want it to refer to something so cool that it hits you like a cinderblock. BAM! "HOLY CRAP! THAT'S SUPER HEAVY!" Well, at least we think so...

An AC guarantee: There will be more entries on slang. Slang's the bomb diggity shiznit in my bookizzle. For Rizzle.

To hold you over until then, please read this great string on slang, over at Subjunctivitis or this one. They're best read when listening to this week's AC1.

Cool Point Distribution:
Shins: 1
"New Slang": 5
Garden State: 1
Zack Braff: 1
Snoop Dizzle: 1
Subjunctivitis: 2

Coming Soon: Get ready for Deckies!

AC1:

That's what we're calling our favorite song picks. It's an homage to the British weekly "Number 1" selection (in name only). AC1s may or may not have amazing weekly sales, they may or may not have outstanding airplay. They may or may not even be a song... But it will be something that I feel can add something to the lyrical and ryhthmic side of our lives. AC1s will also be the most frequent of the Assailable categories to receive posts.

Why? I love music. Always have. And now, with more acts coming out that have something to contribute, and with our culture quickly turning to a bits and pieces marketplace for entertainment, it's easier to fall in love with a song, than with an album or a band.

Surely, I like all other media, too. But songs hit fast, hit on an emotional level, and can be heard many times over in the time it takes to read a book, watch a movie, or surf the Web. Because of that, songs fit in places where other media can't. Try watching Gone with the Wind while grocery shopping, or reading Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing while driving to work (okay...don't try that...seriously...unless you are a Professional Driver on a Closed Course!) So expect more of these...and of course...tell me what you think!

AC1 for May 8, 2005:

The Shins: "New Slang".

Dig it.

Though I was joking about hosting an awards show, I have been pondering a way to recognize those things that matter most to the Assailable Cool community.

When our site is Fully Loaded, and running at capacity, there will be postings about favorite songs, great movies, life-changing books, and bright spots on the web. Currently under development at the secret AC R&D labs is a system that will lable and brand highlights in each category. Honorable mentions will also be noted with proper AC flourish.

In addition to mere recognition, each achievement (as a highlight or as an honorable mention) will earn the artist token Cool Points.

What's a Cool Point, you ask? It's soon to be the easiest mark of how cool something is in comparison to something else...on our site...

For Instance: Say Coldplay's new "Speed of Sound" was picked as the AC Song of the Week (Hmmm, AC SOW? Call the R&D lab, we're going to need some help over here...). Chris Martin & Company could be awarded 5 cool points for the honor. And say that they have continued success with the song (earning repeated honorable mentions), they could keep earning 1 or 2 Cool Points per mention. At the end of the year, you might find out that "Speed of Sound" (according to the AC community) was just as cool as Ben Folds' "Landed," but not nearly as cool as the second single from the new Weezer album.

The same could go for movies. If a movie changes our life, it will surely get a load of CPs. But for every cool media article we spot, or every award it wins, maybe they'll get another Point. This way, you'll easily be able to tell your "Hitchhiker's Guide" from your "War of the Worlds". ("Hitchhiker's" will be the one with more Cool Points. Trust me...)

And who knows what else will earn Points for all those cool people, places, and things out there...

But you wanna know the real fun?
You wanna know why you should care about Cool Points?
Well....

The best part about cool points is: You can contribute to their distribution. That's right! Assail away, because with every comment that adds to the cool of an item, it's another Cool Point headed their way. Love a band and want everyone to know? Write a great critique and get them a Cool Point! Hate a movie, and think you can convince others to as well? You better be persuasive, because you might take a Cool Point away; but you also might inspire people to thoughtfully retaliate, possibly earning back more Cool Points than you took away... See how it works?

The other best part about cool points: You can earn some for yourself! If you're a constant commenter that traditionally adds to our community cool, rest assured: you will be recognized.

Now, at the end of the year, will we host a big gala and give away gaudy awards to the entities that earned the highest Cool Point totals? Nah. But it wouldn't be above us to write a post about it. We might even try for some cool giveaways.

In the meantime, though, get ready for the flood... Next week's posts will include our first major media shout-outs. Be warned!

As always, thanks for tuning in. And stay cool.

As we all know, the best way to be recognized and respected in the world is to give out awards in a lavish and self-serving year-end ceremony. I think that's what I heard somewhere.

Truth be told, I don't know this for sure. But over the last few years, it seems as though there has been a massive proliferation of award shows. And though some of them do matter, and will probably grow to have a place in the world (The Video Game Awards, perhaps?) some feel very very shammy. Like a blatant attempt to get a piece of the public's attention...essentially for nothing... Sometimes I feel like awards show organizers must on a bit of an ego trip. You throw a party where most of the time is spent listening to pretty people read poorly off of Tele-PrompTers. And for this, you expect the most famous people in the world to dress up and waste a night of their Very Important Lives? Why would any one want to do that...for you?

Here's a quick test to find out if your awards show is worth the time it takes to organize and put on:
1) Are you putting on the Annual Oscars Awards Show?
2) Are you putting on the Annual Grammy Award Show?
3) The Emmys?
4) Are you the Hollywood Foreign Press?

If you answered "Yes" to any of the above (even you, Daytime Emmys and Latin Grammys), you may have a valid claim to stage a public event for people to attend or watch at home. The rest of you better start getting around a pretty good excuse (for this year's American Associatoin of Pretty Good Excuses Ceremony). I mean...I'm sorry to break it to you, but Golden Satellites and Billboard Music Awards are little more than pretty doorstops. Please don't fool yourself into thinking otherwise.

Now note, I'm not saying that you can't GIVE out the awards. I'm just saying, don't try to rope CBS into televising the proceedings. They don't need another American Music Awards bringing them down (or another Tony Awards, for that matter). Maybe try giving your awards out in a nice, private ceremony. Maybe you can hold it in some cool smokey Jazz club somewhere, making it nice and intimate...an event to remember. That way, you won't need to fill up a huge auditorium with expensive gowns and tuxes and look like a pale Oscar imitator. Just a thought.

You know, they give out awards for most everything: from Top Sales Person to Most Original Culinary Creation, depending on your profession or area of interest. But usually, the organizations that give out these awards don't force the general public to care by broadcasting for everyone to see, or by prenteding to be something more important than they actually are...

Remember, the goal of giving awards should be to honor those that need honoring.

Hmmm. That sounds like the goal of this blog...

Maybe we should be giving out awards....
Yeah! That's a brilliant idea! We could get everyone to come and we can have all these people present and we couldhaveJoanandMelissaontheredcarpetI
wonderifMikeMyerswouldcomethat'dbesogreat...

...Hold on, I have to go call CBS.

Just a note to those of you who are currently seeing AC in billboard-size, Arial font. It isn't supposed to look that crappy.
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